Password Sharing

As I discussed in my previous post, technology has been changing how relationships develop. Years ago, a couple displayed their love for each other by offering a letterman jacket or giving a fraternity pin to a new girlfriend. The new generation’s connection to technology has changed the way couples show their love. The current trend amongst teenagers is to share their passwords to email accounts and social media sites with their boyfriend/girlfriend.

These days the majority of the information we consider private can be found on our computers or cellphones. Personally, I have two passwords to access my computer and a passcode on my IPhone. I was shocked to hear about this new trend of password sharing since I consider a lot of my information on my computer as private. Also, I would not want someone to be able to access my Facebook or Twitter since there could be a lot of damage done very quickly.

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According to The New York Times January 2012 article, “They say they know such digital entanglements are risky, because a souring relationship can lead to people using online secrets against each other. But that, they say, is part of what makes the symbolism of the shared password so powerful.” Couples are beginning to share their passwords because they feel it’s a sign of trust. They are showing their partner that there is nothing to hide from one another.

“Trust is an important bedrock for any relationship, but this isn’t trust. This is mutually assured trust destruction. Intimacy comes from sharing select private information with people, not giving them keys to your privacy kingdom.” -Forbes

However, if the relationship was to dissolve the damage that can be done with access to a social media account for example could be extensive. The Forbes article stated that once you share your password you are violating the privacy of the people you have interacted with too. I agree with that statement because people share plenty of personal information via email or social media that they probably do not want to be read by anyone’s partner as well.

The expert, Rosalind Wiseman who studies how teenagers use technology believes that the pressure to share a password is similar to the pressure to have sex. Educators and parents stress how important it is not to share personal information such as a password. Since it is so forbidden by our parents Rosalind Wiseman believes it seems more attractive to share a password, much like how teens view sex.

A child psychologist stated, “What worries me is we haven’t done a very good job at stopping kids from having sex, so I’m not real confident about how much we can change this behavior.” 

Passwords are more than just a combination of letters and numbers or some other confusing requirement by the website, they are literally a key to loads of information. People need to be selective to whom they decide to share this key with and my advice is to keep as it should be, a secret word to access information for your eyes only.

From Courting to Texting

As a new generation where technology consumes our everyday life the act of being courted in a relationship is essentially nonexistent. Personally, as a twenty-year old girl I have never had a man show up at my doorstep with flowers or throwing rocks at my window. However, I have gotten my fair share of "Hey, Whats up? Do you wanna hang out tomorrow?" text messages. I do not know if men do not have the courage these days to show up unexpectedly or if they are taking advantage of the convenience of texting. 

According to, Your Tango, a dating advice website, texting should not be present before the first date because it can lead to opportunities for miscommunication. Therefore, it is suggested that we use the new technology of a cellphone for its main purpose, to call someone.

"Relationships can end today, simply because a cell phone is lost, a battery is dead, or the device is misplaced. Not getting a text, can be overreacted to and effect the relationship unless the partners have some ground rules and understanding." -Psychology Today

PsychologyToday states that texting is extremely low on the intimacy hierarchy since there is less social interaction. Talking on the phone and meeting in person provide more intimacy but also cause more social anxiety.  I am more likely text someone I just met because I think if I would call they would be confused, as if we were moving too fast. The few men I have dated were the ones who were not afraid to call just to say hi or see what I was doing at the moment, even in the beginning stages of our relationship.

According to AskMen.com, “The worst downfalls in text communication come with people that you know well enough to speak with but not well enough to pick up the phone and chat with.” I have a particular friend that develops friendships and even attempts to begin an intimate relationship via texting. When the time comes to meet up with the guy she dodges the thought of even picking up the phone to call him. How is one expected to spend the next couple of hours with a person if they have never heard their voice before?

Our society has become so accustomed to the convenience of texting that everyone uses it and forgets the old fashion way of courting. I am not expecting a man to show up with a bouquet of roses on my doorstep in order to get my attention. However, I believe that every girl would appreciate some courting every once and awhile even if it is just a phone call.